This story includes simple tips and tricks to help any family so they don't have a situation like poor Bridget had to endure.

COURSE NAME: Karen Gonzalez-Martin @ karenlauderinc@gmail.com

REPORT TITLE-

Mom Sets Up Camera, Sees Why 6 Babysitters Quit

 

This story includes simple tips 

and tricks to help any family so they don't

have a situation like poor Bridget had

to endure.

Mom Sets Up Camera, Sees Why 6 Babysitters Quit

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The message came completely out of the

blue, and she was once again left high

and dry. A string of six babysitters in

six months with no explanation. Tears

prickled in her tired eyes, she knew she

had to do something rather devious but

she never suspected the real cause of

all her problems.

 The story begins with

Bridget Elks. As most moms would know

juggling motherhood and a career is no

easy task. After her marriage hadn't gone

according to plan, she had to work full

time just to keep herself and her three

children afloat. Eventually she had no

choice after calling in all her favors

from friends and relatives, she

desperately needed some help. After

conducting a few interviews one young

woman really stood out. Bridget

introduced her to the children,

six-year-old Marie, and one-year-old Kirk.

She ended up hiring Lisa on the spot.

Thinking all her problems would soon be

over Bridget felt like she would finally

breathe easy, but that didn't last long.

Bridgette considered herself lucky to

have found a great babysitter so quickly.

In just a few weeks the young woman had

become a part of the family. Bridget felt

like a weight had been lifted off her

shoulders because she no longer had to

take time off to take Murray to

pre-school, play date’s, and extracurricular

activities but she wasn't prepared for

the bombshell that followed three weeks

Later. Bridgette received an alarming

text message from Lisa that left her

shocked and confused. The nanny informed

that she was resigning with immediate

effect and asked bridget to have her

final paycheck ready that evening.

When bridget arrived home that evening

Lisa abruptly left without another word.

Clearly something had happened. Lisa

later told bridgette over text message

that she had quite because of Marie but

that couldn't be right. Bridget knew her

child and she refused to believe it.

Angrily defending her little angel, she

told Lisa that her abrupt resignation

had been very unprofessional, now she had

a big and the hiring process all over

again.

Six months later Bridget was at her

wit's end when the sixth nanny walked

out the door bridget couldn't believe it.

Sure looking after two kids can be a

handful but she paid this woman well and

didn't think she wasn't asking for too

much.

The problem couldn't be with her or her

child could it?,

Why were they all so unreliable?

When bridget hired ‘Meg, the seventh nanny,

she already had a plan in place. She had

borrowed a few nanny cams from her

friends to get to the bottom of the

problem. She hadn't believed the other

woman when they said that Marie had been

the problem, so she set the cameras up

all over the house to see what was

really going on.

Everything happened like clockwork just

like the previous times she hired a new

nanny. Things seemed to go well in the

beginning but sure enough Bridgette

received the seventh nanny's resignation.

Just two weeks later, but this time

Bridget would be able to see exactly

what had happened for herself but when

she watched the footage she was

horrified.

Bridget's eye grew wider the more she

watched, she couldn't believe what she

was seeing. Maureen never acted this way

around her so she had no reason to

believe all the babysitter's fake

allegations.

In the first week Marie was a little

angel but towards the end Bridget didn't

even recognize her own daughter. Bridget

watched Meg politely ask Murray to hand

her the baby's diaper bag because her

hands were full, “you can't tell me what

to do”, the little girl screeched. I'm the

boss of you.

Every time Meg asked Marie to do

something like wash her hands before

lunch, or get ready for school Marie

would refuse, Bridget was furious the,

last draw for Meg had been the day she

had resigned.

She asked Marie who was running around

and making a noise the police quietened

down because her baby brother had just

fallen asleep. “I'm the boss of you, I'll

get you fired”, Marie screamed in the

babysitter's face.

Bridget watched his mate try to

de-escalate the situation then she

reached for her phone.

Bridgette set Marie down and explained

that she had to respect her babysitter.

She showed her the evidence that she'd

been acting out and try to talk to her

calmly. She asked the six-year-old if she

thought her behavior was acceptable but

Marie's response left her absolutely

floored… “we pay her, I'm her boss!” Marie

snapped back where was this behavior

coming from.

While Bridgette scrambled to try and

find a replacement nanny, there was no

one to take Marie to her swimming

lessons. When the little girl complained,

Bridgette pointed out that she was to be

blamed.

She is the reason that her sitter quit

and antler can find someone new. She

won't get to do the fun activities that

her sitter took her to. The furious mom

vented in a parenting group on facebook,

but was the punishment enough? I was

furious with my daughter and let her

have it. She had several things taken

away from her and she didn't do anything

remotely fun until recently.

Bridgette continued, I also stopped

arranging playdates for her, and removed a

friend who treated her nanny terribly.

They no longer go to the same school, so they

don't see each other at all anymore, but

what?, did other parents think

her action impacted someone enough to

make them quit a day job. They're being

paid to work? She has soiled her reputation.

As word spreads fast within the

babysitter community, if a child treats

their caregiver, like that one mom wrote

on the original post, I can imagine this

wasn't an isolated event but more like

it was happening way more frequently but

those times were when the babysitter was

at her last straw. Then other babysitters

leveled their opinion on the whole

situation. I was lucky that the parents

supported my punishments. It definitely

helps when the problem is tackled on

both sides as a unified force but kids

will be kids, and what works for one

definitely doesn't work for all. Then

professional’s chimed in. It sounds to me

like she was unhappy with the situation.

The fact that she had a sitter in the

first place. Wiki.com, broadband founder of

the parenting blog “honest mom”, wrote,

maybe she wasn't feeling like her needs

were being met. She might have felt that

she wasn't being listened to, had lost

all autonomy over, even her smallest of

decisions clashed with her personality

wise or most likely was feeling a little

abandoned by her parents in the scenario divorce.

So could Bridget have handled the whole

situation differently. ‘Wiki’ pointed out,

that while most single moms need help

with child care, and are not abandoning

their children when they get help, it may

have been understandable for Marie to

have felt let down by her mom.

Vicky pointed out that Marie might have

felt especially resentful about the

whole situation… one of the reasons for

needing a sitter were not explained to

her properly by her mama. Vicki said that

it's so important for parents to always

explain the why behind decisions and

scenarios, and this is especially true

when they might affect them emotionally.

Instead of just expecting Marie to

expect a babysitter, she needed to be

told exactly why Bridget had to hire one

so Bridget should have told Marie that

she needed a babysitter. Because she had

to work hard, in order to be able to pay for

Marie's dolls, swimming lessons, food etc,

and the reasoning behind this,

reminding them how emotionally safe and

loved they are, is key too. I personally

hate having a nanny and later

babysitters. As a young child ‘Wiki’

explained ‘I wanted to be with my parents

at all times’. Which is completely normal

and natural and although it was

explained to me that they needed to work.

Therefore I needed sitters. It didn't

make life that much easier for me.

According to Vicky, Marie might have felt

hurt or like her feelings weren't being

considered, which caused her to act out.

Marie was trying to tell her mother that

she didn't want a sitter and her acting

out was a cry for help. Does that mean

‘Wiki.com’ thought Marie had behaved

appropriately, and that Bridget was in

the wrong. “Yes!”, teaching children that

they can't be rude is crucial but so is

listening Vicky said, and I mean really

listening to them, to the unspoken as

well as the spoken, cues and empathizing

with their behavior, while explaining

better ways to express themselves so as

to not to hurt others, but ‘Wiki’ noticed

something else about Marie's behavior.

That indicated the scenario wasn't quite

as cut and dry as it seemed.

Bridget was right to tell Marie that she

had been hurtful, but she should have

always tried to understand why Marie was

acting out in the first place. If they

can't describe why it's hard even for

adults to self-reflect and psycho-analyze

themselves, then it's your job as a

parent to put in the detective work and

ensure they feel more supported. ‘Wiki’

said, so who else was in the wrong here?

Furthermore, in this scenario an adult

must have at some point told the girl

that she was the boss of her sitter.

Either a jest, or an old seriousness. As

h6 is quite young to understand the

complexities of money, and the power that

might give someone, ‘wiki.com’ concluded for

Bridget it had been a real eye-opener

Also, after looking up “how to get your

child ready for a nanny or babysitter”,

she realized some crucial steps she had

missed. The first one made her feel

particularly foolish in general. It is

important to build a solid bond, and

lines of communication, and not just the

night before the new addition arrives.

Give a child at least a week to process

the new information, and as mentioned

before tell them why this eliminates as

many “unknowns” as possible. There are more

super useful tips for any family and

kids of any age. Invite the new

babysitter or nanny over for dinner, a

few days before her real shift starts.

This acts as a stepping stone and lets

the child get used to the idea of having

a new person in their life it goes a

long way to ease most tensions.

However, the meetup doesn't just end

because the plates are cleared. After

dinner bring out one of the kiddo's

favorite games or activities, this not

only lets the nanny and child bond a

little, but it also allows the parents to

see how the two interact and communicate

with each other. The next step is ‘duo day’.

One day together. When it comes to

successful transitioning there is no

such thing as over communicating.

Have the nanny or babysitter come over

and spend time going through the day or

evening's events, rituals, and necessities.

Go about your day like you would

normally do but have a new helper take

part in everything from snack prep, to

getting them into bed. Next, believe it or

not involves special tricks with toys.

Kids don't like inconsistencies. It

doesn't foster a sense of security. If

the child knows what's coming, they can

handle it with flying colors. Parents can

grant another layer of confidence in

their kids by doing one simple thing,

just add the child's favorite toy in the

mix while doing everyday tasks, giving

them a usual toy when you go for a walk,

bringing out their preferred book during

bedtime, this lets them to know that

things aren't really different. They

haven't lost anything, the next one

however might be a little more

challenging.

Having the kids feel in charge in some

way can help. By leaps and bounds, this

can be done by bringing them along when

the nanny or babysitter comes by for the

first visit. Let them show their new

friend around the house, or take out the

snacks they enjoy, but there is one thing

you have to be really careful with while

it's important for them to feel safe,

maybe even “empowered”, they can't go

around acting like a little maniac boss

like Marie did. They need to know that

the new person is the one in charge

without them feeling dominated. The house

rules such as homework and chores

remains intact, the final tip might be

the hardest to navigate while it might

be impossible to imagine someone else

escorting your child to the timeout

corner while they're crying like the

world has a bad end. However, the nanny or

babysitter needs to be able to correct

unwanted behavior and remain in charge

this is where the parents communication

is key.

Moms and dads must clearly outline what

the nanny or babysitter is allowed to do

and how they should go about it. Maybe

even take notes or send messages when it

happens so parents can talk about it

when they get home. 

Well there you have it simple tips 

and tricks to help any family so they don't

have a situation like poor Bridget had

to endure.